Quit micromanaging your editor!

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Hey, writer: If you don’t know anything about CMS, AP, APA or MLA, then don’t correct my editor. SHE knows CMS and you don’t. Please let her do her job and get out of her way. Your job is to write. Her job is to edit. Stop trying to micromanage something you know nothing about.

“Stop” it with the quotation marks “already”!

Dear writer, if you’re using quotation marks around every other word in nearly every sentence you’ve written, it’s overkill. Do “you” get “what” I’m “saying”? Or do I “need” to point “it” out to “you”?! Stop making “dumb” choices when you “write.” Good thing you have an editor. Otherwise, surly readers would be tempted to bludgeon you out of frustration!

Don’t pass off others’ work as yours! It’s called plagiarism!

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Swiping material, using it in your manuscript and not crediting who originally wrote such material is called plagiarism, and no self-respecting writer should do that.

Writers, CITE your source material.

KNOW the rules of Fair Use when it comes to material.

UNDERSTAND copyright laws/rules.

Don’t pass off quotes as yours.

Don’t swipe articles off the internet and pass them off as yours, either. That’s STEALING!

This is elementary stuff. It’s the basics. You should KNOW better. Don’t think your editor won’t catch you at it or call you on it, because he/she WILL!

Know your semicolon!

For the love of all that’s holy, if you aren’t sure know how to use a semicolon, please don’t. Yes, semicolons are sexy (at least I think they are). Yes, semicolons are exotic (in my world, at least). Yes, semicolons are sophisticated (of course they are!). However, semicolons are NOT for the faint of heart.

To avoid making yourself look like a rank amateur, do your homework on the semicolon. Research it, learn about its usage and practice using them. Only after you have a working knowledge should you consider using it.

Otherwise, if you submit a manuscript that’s riddled with misused semicolons in place of periods and commas, your editor will be one unhappy camper. Take it from me.

Could you, or couldn’t you?

If you could care less, then you mean you COULD care less about something.

If you couldn’t care less, then you mean you COULD NOT care less about something.

Learn the difference. Too many people are using could care less when they really couldn’t care less!

Please don’t ejaculate…at least when writing dialogue!

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My favorite of the worst dialogue tags? The word “ejaculated” instead of “said.” You’ll find it in older literature, and it always makes me wince/laugh. Example: “Oh god, you can’t be serious!” he ejaculated. I visualize something funny, yet unpleasant, when I read that tag.

If you have to add a dialogue tag, using “said” is okay. You don’t have to use the thesaurus to find replacements so you’ll sound cooler. In the end, you DON’T!

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